Somehow I eneded up in the Hospital. Holland Hospital that is. Probably have a line infection again. These things suck! The pain is excruciating and makes you so uncomfortable you just want it to end. Even morphine doesn't kill the pain totally. The pain just sits somewhere until the antibiotics kick in and the line gets pulled.
I'm doing better today, but this experience may have put me over the top. It has made me really think about whether we should move forward with a transplant. I feel in so many ways I am letting people down at work, at home, and even myself. I just can't seem to kick this, and it's messing with my head.
So as my old my friend Jim Soule used to say - What do you want? What do you want? I don't know yet. But I may be getting closer.
Oh, Matthew! So sorry to read this update. Praying that between the time you posted this morning and the time I've read it things have gotten so much better. Also praying for a pain free, restful night of sleep! You are all loved!
ReplyDeleteThe Willemsteins
Matthew, we are echoing the Willemsteins comment. Praying praying praying for less pain, more clarity and some guidance in your decision. Your family has been so strong through all of this. Is there anything we can do?
ReplyDeleteHopefully by the time you read this you are at home and recovered. Love, Richerts.